12 Days of Christmas, JLA Style
by Mr. BramStoker
Summary: Your favorite Leaguers perform their version of that famed oldie but goodie Christmas folk song!


**12 days of Christmas JLA style**

 _On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me_

 _A Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

"GET ME OUTTA HERE!" Hawkgirl squawked irately in a small nest

 _On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me_

 _Two-faced doves_

"WHAT?" Two-Face shouted, confused

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

"I'm gonna wring your scrawny neck when this is over!" Hawkgirl threatened

 _On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me_

 _Three Robins falling_

"WHAAAAAAAAAAA!" Robin screamed, as he was falling in a zero gravity shaft

 _Two-faced doves_

 __"STOP PECKING ME!" Two-Face screamed in annoyance

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

Hawkgirl: ZZZZZ…

 _On the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me_

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

Spoiler: *foaming at the mouth*

 _Three Robins falling_

Robin: AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHIIIIYYYYAAA

 _Two-faced doves_

"AAAAAARRRGH!" Two-Face screamed in annoyance

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

Hawkgirl: (still asleep, drools and drops a bit on Two-Face)

Two-Face: YECCH! THANKS A BUNCH, SHAYERA

 _On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me_

Hippolyta: FIIIIIVVVVEEEE WEEEEDDDINNNNNGGGG RRRRRINNNGGGS! Ba dum, ba dum

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

Spoiler: (drowning in rabies)

 _Three Robins flying_

Robin: GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH

 _Two-faced doves_

"DAMMIT ROBIN, YOU SCARED THE BIRDS!" Two-Face shouted

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

Hawkgirl: ZZZZZZZZ

 _On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me_

 _Six Fireflys flying_

"WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Firefly cackled maniacally

FIIIIIVVVEEE WEEEDDDINNNNG RRRRINNGS! Ba dum, bom bom

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

(Spoiler drowningin asea of foam)

 _Three Robins falling_

Robin: *has laryngitis*

 _Two-faced doves_

"Eh, that's better" Two-Face exhaled in relief

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

Hawkgirl: ZZZZZ

 _On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me_

 _Seven Crocs a chomping_

"OMNOMNOMNOMNOM" Killer Croc gobbled viciously

 _Six Fireflys flying_

"WAAAAAHOOOOOOOO!" Firefly whooped

"FIIIVEEE WEDDINNGGGG RIINNNGSS! Ba dum, bom bom"

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

"Damn, son, she dead" Cyborg informed

 _Three Robins falling_

Robin: *gives the middle finger to the camera*

 _Two-faced doves_

Two-Face: I'm getting the hang of this

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

Hawkgirl: Zzzzzz

 _On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me_

 _Eight Boomers belching_

"UUUUURRRRRPPPPPP" Booster Gold belched

 _Seven Crocs a chomping_

"Lawd almighty, that's DISGUSTING!" Croc wheezed, clutching his nose

 _Six Fireflys flying_

"BUUUURRRRRRRRNNNNN!"

"FIVE WEDDING RINGS!" Ba dom, bom bom

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

(still dead)

 _Three Robins falling_

Robin: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

 _Two-faced doves_

"GOD DAMMIT ROBIN, NOT AGAIN!"

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

Hawkgirl: eating pears

 _On the 9th day of Christmas my true love gave to me_

 _Nine Luthors leaping_

Lex: *growling irately, duct tape over mouth*

 _Eight Boosters belching_

"UUUUUURRRRRRRRRRPPPPP"

 _Seven crocs a chomping_

Croc: (chomping up Spoiler's carcass)

 _Six Fireflys flying_

Firefly: torches Booster

"FIIVEEE WEDDING RIINGS! Ba dum, bom bom"

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

"Tasted like chicken" Croc remarked

 _Good. Now go buy some_

 _Three Robins falling_

Robin: vomits

 _Two-faced doves_

"What the- AAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGG!"

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

Hawkgirl: ZZZZZZZZ

 _On the 10th day of Christmas my true love gave to me_

 _Ten Lindas a-lazing_

"ZZZZZZZZ" Linda snored

 _Nine Luthors leaping_

*Lex trips and falls into deep space*

 _Eight Boosters belching_

"YUUUUURRRRRRRRRRPPPPPP"

 _Seven Crocs a chomping_

"CCCCCHHHHHHIIIICCCCKKKKEEEENNNNNN!"

 _Have you bought any chicken yet?_

 _Six Fireflys flying_

"YIIIIIIIIIIII"

"FIVE WEDDING RINGS. Ba dum, bom bom"

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

… _._

 _Three Robins falling_

"I pissed my pants"

 _Two-faced doves_

"THAT'S IT! SCREW YOU GUYS, I'M GOING TO MY BAR!" *walks off*

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

"ZZZZZZZ"

 _On the 11th day of Christmas my true love gave to me_

 _Eleven flaming Flashes_

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Flash screamed, as his body was on fire

 _Ten Lindas a-lazing_

"ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ"

 _Nine Luthors leaping_

*is abducted and anal probed by Kryptonians*

 _Eight Boosters belching_

"… could really need some Pepto Bismol"

 _Seven Crocs a chomping_

"CHICKEN!"

 _Now go buy some_

 _Six Fireflys flying_

*lights all the Christmas trees in Metropolis on fire*

"FIIIIVVVEEE WEDDING RIINGS! Ba dum, bom bom"

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

… _._

 _Three Robins failing_

"I give up"

 _Two-faced doves_

*still gone*

 _And a Hawkgirl in a pear tree_

"Zzzzzz"

 _On the 12th day of Christmas my true love gave to me_

 _12 Canaries chomping_

"OM NOMNOMNOMNOM" Black Canary gobbled

 _Eleven flaming Flashes_

"WWWWWAAAAAAAA"

 _Ten Lindas lazing_

"zzzzzzz"

 _Nine Luthors leaping_

*is farmed for blood by Dracula*

 _Eight Boosters belching_

"YUUUUUUURRRRRRPPP"

 _Seven Crocs a chomping_

*has a tug of war over a fried drumstick with Black Canary*

 _Six Fireflys flying_

 _Everybody: FFFFIIIIVVVVEEE WEEEDDDDINNNNGGG RIIIINGS_

 _Four Spoilers foaming_

 _Three Robins falling_

 _Two-faced doves_

 _ **AND A HAWKGIRL IN A PEAR TREE!**_

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Hawkgirl and everyone shouted


End file.
